A bit of backstory.

​In 2017 I wrote a blog piece about sexuality that struck a huge chord online. The response was huge and unequivocal. I was contacted by women all over the world, asking... Please, can you teach this? So, three years later, here is the yes. Hell yes. Let's explore the juicy, sometimes scary, wonderful and wild edge of female sexuality, which is intimately woven in with our vitality, creativity, life force. When we unlock our sexuality, we unlock our power. When we break the chains that bind us, we are on the road to freedom.

(Note... When I say female I am talking about anyone born into a female body, regardless of their gender).

Women, Unchained is a 7 day immersion retreat in South Coast NSW where we start to explore this material using a plethora of powerful tools. Check out this page and if the retreat resonates for you, and you can get to the NSW South Coast in May, we've arranged a brilliant team of women to support you in this journey. And if you can't make this retreat, keep an eye out, because we'll be taking Women, Unchained on the road as travel opens up. 

Here are a couple of sparks from the blog that ignited this blaze.

'When it comes to sex, women tend to be a combination lock. Our emotional state factors in hugely; are we angry or sad or frustrated or needy or feeling unseen or unloved? Have the kids been hanging off us all day like baby birds with their mouths endlessly open? Is the moon in pisces have I got the promotion does my bum look big in these jeans? Are the lights horrible is there music what if I don’t get wet and he notices and I haven't had a shower do I… you know… smell? Is he going to want to stick it in my bum?

And then there is the physical, mechanical stuff. Some like it up and down, some like round and round. Some like a pointy tongue tip, others need flat pressure. Some like their clits sucked, for others it means immediate desensitising. Hood on or hood off? Fingers hooked in to the g spot or fingers thrusting or no fingers at all? And that’s before we even get to penetration… tip or shaft, deep or shallow? Tease or fierce?

What about that moment when we are done, we have had enough, we want to stop, and feel obligated to keep going even if it now hurts or we are silently gritting our teeth and bearing it?

The pressure to have an orgasm very often kills any chance of it actually happening. Sometimes it is easier to just give up on the whole thing, or fake it to bring the whole sordid act to an end.

How on earth are our lovers expected to figure all of this out if we don’t tell them? Seriously, how? I feel in particular for men, who don't know what it is to have the complexity of female genitals and the hugely changeable emotional factors that are part of our personal sexual weather systems. At least if our lovers are in female bodies, they know what it's like. For men the pressure must be huge; either they become bloodhounds on the scent, alert for every subtle change in body language, every sigh and moan, or they give up and just pound their way to their own pleasure, cos frankly it’s all too hard to figure out and we aren't telling them.

We aren't telling them.'

'It strikes me every time I run a Heart of the Huntress retreat (exploring archetypes of power) that getting our needs met is a huge part of women being powerful in the world. And for a million reasons, many (if not most) women feel like they have no voice. It feels impossible to say anything. Whether it is in bed or in a job or a relationship. Not like that, like this. This works for me. I need. We can be paralysed in so many situations because from some young age we have been taught that it is not safe to have needs, let alone express them.

I need.

Neediness has become a swear word, where for me, needs are just that. Needs. Not optional extras, not fringe benefits. They are needs. We have bodies that need to be touched the right way, and when they are we flower and bloom into ecstasy, which our lovers will adore and want more of. If they're actual lovers, that is. We need intimacy and love and connection, we need to feel nourished and fulfilled for ourselves in our lives, not just in service to everyone else. We need to have parts of our lives just for us, where we come first.
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We come first. Pun intended.
And hopefully second, third, fourth and fifth.'

​From Gina Chick's blog, Oct 2017

​Sexuality is as individual as our fingerprint. It’s a complex weaving of many many factors… physical body, gender, hormones, chromosomes, cultural stories, family stories, generational patterns, biological history, trauma events, personal judgements, expectations, insecurities, confidences, compensations, woven into today's emotional weather report. Trying to make sense of it all can be like trying to find a polar bear in a rather large snowstorm.

To me a helpful way to think about this is to imagine that at birth we each receive a structure, let’s call it a shape, made up of the myriad facets that define aspects of our sexuality. This structure changes and evolves through time as we do, minute to minute, year to year as we learn and grow and act and react, a life in motion, the dance of becoming. How we shine the light of our essence through that shape is a deeply individual process, and for most of us, a lifelong journey.

Some elements of that structure can feel almost immutable, for example… I am born into a woman’s body, so I can never know what it is to be born with a penis, or… a traumatic event happened when I was five, and I can never go back and change it and it is now woven inextricably into my history, or… I am effortlessly multiorgasmic; my body just seems to naturally do it.
(It's worth noting that while we can't change the things that have happened, we can always always transform our responses and therefore the impact of these factors in our lives) 

Other elements of our sexual blueprint are quite fluid, for example, in a relationship with an open, aware partner who values connection, I might relax into my sexuality as we learn each other and discover new pathways to pleasure. Or, after a negative experience my sexuality can shut down for days or months or even years. When my physical body changes my self judgement can make me dread sex. When I am feeling sexy my whole attitude to sex becomes more adventurous and open. When I finally healed my block against asking for what I need I need  my partner was overjoyed and can’t wait to follow my direction. And so on.

By bringing awareness and presence into these parameters we can grow and change the energetic shape of our sexuality. 

That’s what this retreat is about. It’s a place to get together with others who also have questions and frustrations.  We support each other in a safe, held space while we dance our stories, dance our feelings, work through roadblocks and old wounds, see our patterns, role play (with plenty of giggles) how to ask for what we need (and to be clear, this might be as simple as asking for someone to pass the salt), learn to stop apologising for our existence (sorry not sorry), practice finding our voice with each other so when we get back to the world and possible lovers we’ve laid down some new neural pathways. We will look at the Good Girl archetype, the obedient one who looks after everyone else’s needs before her own. We’ll learn how to say no with our bodies and respect what is true inside, no matter the external pressure. Respecting our own needs is the first step toward helping others respect our bodies.

​Nobody learns this stuff all at once, by the way. I wish I could say this workshop will wave a magic wand and all our sexual traumas will vanish, ta-daaah. 
It’s a process, and we take those steps toward identifying and clearing up the murkiness in our own sexual patterns, in a supported group where we realise that we’re not alone, that our stories are shared, and that there is nothing truly wrong with us. 
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I do know that it's impossible to get through a 7 day embodiment retreat like this without transformation occurring in some form. We get to change our shape, and shine the light of our essence through new facets, go back into Life and try on these new tools, new techniques, new realisations. Learn and grow and shift and flow. Stay in touch with a community of sisters who understand and support us. 
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Yes please, i want to sign up

THIS WORKSHOP WILL INCLUDE
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• Two to three 5Rhythms®dance/movement sessions each day. This  means about 6 hours of movement. Don't worry, you take it at your own pace! You don't need any experience at all.
• At least one group breathwork session with qualified practitioner Amber Nomchong.
• Exploration of the core material of Women, Unchained in a gentle, safe container with full consent. We utterly respect your no! You can say no to anything that doesn't feel right for you, in this retreat. 
• Art therapy to creatively process.
• Discovering what we feel, want and need in our lives and bodies, and how to get those needs met.
• Archery to connect with our inner Katniss Everdeen. Yes, you can shoot an arrow!
• Unravelling the Good Girl archetype, learning how to say hell yes, and hell no.
• Experiential exercises to connect us with our instincts and internal authority.
• Feminine archetypes of power taught in the Heart of the Huntress map
• ​Earth/primitive/rewilding skills
• Ritual theatre
• A whole bunch more that evolves in the moment.

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​WHAT IS 5RHYTHMS MOVEMENT MEDITATION?
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The 5Rhythms® Waves map is a stunning tool for exploration of what it is that makes us human, on our way to our divinity. It is the place to find and actively release our judgements about self and other, to explore the stories that we have carried since (and before) birth, to connect with our own perfect dance. Each of us is unique. Like snowflakes, we are shaped by our journeys in these bodies, and just as no two humans have the same journey, so no two humans can have the same dance. When we let fall comparisons and touch the parts of ourselves that wish to express, we transform our suffering into art, and discover something amazing...

...Bodies want to move, and they know exactly what to do if we get out of the way. Psyches yearn to be whole, and will  show us the places where we need to pay attention. The human organism moves toward unity and oneness like an air bubble moves to the surface or a flower turns to the light. Humans are a combination lock, and only you can discover your combination, by flowing into listening, by moving what is true, by letting go that which is ready to fall, by giving your soul wings, and by breathing into the space that is what you truly are, so that your essence reveals itself in every shape your body makes, and freedom is a felt sense, a known force, a homecoming. We are so that we are.

WHY ARCHERY?

We've been using archery as a metaphor for power for years now in our Heart of the Huntress retreats. One one level it's a useful tool to embody power, taking us out of concepts and theories and into a visceral state where we connect with the feeling of power and can track our progress in real time. On another level... it's just fun. This retreat is a deep dive into some edgy material. If it's all serious and earnest it's plain exhausting. Shooting arrows lets us blow off steam, have a break, have some fun.

So to be clear... This isn't archery school. We're not shooting hundreds of arrows with fanatical precision, working on perfect form. We are a bunch of women shooting the shit out of some targets to feel that primal atavistic joy when you hear the thwack of an arrow striking home, the cheer from your sisters when you hit the target, the feeling of power as your body instinctively lines up and you learn how to shoot, the sense of 'i can' replacing 'i can't'. And then we go back in to dance what is true, dive into the next layer of our stories, process the next challenge, having integrated the last one.

EVERYONE can shoot arrows. You only need to see the pics to understand why we do it. Cos it's awesome and we can.
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NUTS AND BOLTS

​Where: 
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​Covid matters and refunds:

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Bamarang Bush Retreat, West Nowra, NSW
Sat 8th May 3pm til Friday 14th May 3pm
​From Sydney airport... Drive, rideshare if available or train to Bomaderry and we pick you up from there.
Mud brick houses, share rooms (max 4 per room) or camping if you're feeling the need to be more distanced.
​Locally sourced, organic where possible, exquisite.
Facilitated by international facilitator Gina Chick of Wild Heart Australia
Breathwork with Amber Nomchong of Body Being
Archery with Gina and Amber
Supported by Sue Anderson, 5Rhythms teacher
Supported by Jackie McInnes, 5Rhythms teacher and nurse practitioner
Full 7 day workshop all meals, accommodation, materials and workshop... all inclusive $1590
$500 deposit to hold your place, balance due 3 weeks prior to workshop. 
Earlybird: payment in full by Feb 28 $1390 (you can pay the $500 deposit to hold your place and pay the balance by Feb 28)
Account Wild Heart
BSB 016494 Acct 598969157
​Reference your name and Unchained
Full refunds (non covid related) are available up to 3 weeks prior to the retreat. Refunds 2- 3 weeks prior minus a $250 processing fee. No refunds less than 2 weeks prior unless you find someone to take your place. Covid lockdown refunds are available at any time.
The retreat is capped at 28 participants. Room sharing: no more than four people to a room. Meals are outside. Hand sanitiser is available. There will be minimal touch and maximum respect for self generated parameters. If you want to socially distance more by bringing a tent and camping, please do. The price is the same whether you take advantage of a room or bring a tent. If you wish to dance outside, you can. If you have special covid concerns, we'll do everything we can to help you feel safe to the level of distancing you require.

yes please, sign me up